When two souls find each other in the physical world, love is not as easy as it should be. Love in its purest form is freely given and expressed without interruption and expectation. But in the physical world, love will be marred by the ego, keeping love from flowing naturally. You must fight against that.
The great mystic OSHO was known to be very controversial in his radical teachings of love. He believed that a love free of jealousy and possessiveness, one where freedom was held at a higher value than love itself is vital to experience the true love he speaks of. He says this is not only possible, but is quite natural and necessary, for us to learn what Being in love is all about. That real love knows no fear and when these feelings arise, it is most likely a fear of being alone.
Real love is capable of being alone, utterly alone, and out of that aloneness grows a togetherness. -Osho
I love exploring this concept. We are BEINGS in a conscious state of IN lovingness, all the time. It IS our natural state and what we are designed to do. It’s looking at life through a different lens and finding love in everything we see, we do, we touch, we feel, we experience. But when it comes to relationships, especially romantic ones, it’s typically that pesky little “ego” and his bestie “fear” that get in the way of us LIVING this truth. From the day we are born into this world, the conditioning begins.
When I was a little girl, my sister and I were obsessed with Disney, because that was what we were given. Stories about finding your prince, by getting poisoned, or kissing frogs, or being enslaved by a treacherous stepmom, or sacrificing yourself or defying parents, was about the only way to find TRUE love. Oh and did I mention that he HAD to be a prince? Sorry Aladdin. The obstacles that lie at the root of a deep yearning and longing by all these princesses we idolized growing up, was a need to be loved and accepted. I’m not sure at what age the veil of this fairytale lifted for me, but I do know it happened pretty early on. Really what it ends up leading to, is one hell of an expensive therapy bill later on in life. Trust me I know!
No one ever truly taught me anything about love and relationships. My mother remained tight lipped when it came to her tumultuous yet passionate relationship with my non existent father as a child. When I was 25 years old, according to her, I was still “too young to understand”. So if all I had to go by were these lofty airy fairy dreams of love, then I was doomed as far as I was concerned. Cut to now as an adult, looking back on my past relationships, I’m learning to accept that they aren’t failures but instead have been great experiences of love expressing through me in relation to another.
I am grateful for the opportunities that have allowed me open up to love, shifting my mindset of being heartbroken to HEART OPEN.
I’m nowhere near the type of enlightenment that Osho teaches, but I am beginning to REcognize. Love is never about attaching yourself to an outcome, a person, a belief or even constructs of the mind that have been placed there by conditionings of our parents, peers, societal norms, Disney movies and the media. Love isn’t about fear or comparisons. Love just IS. It is our natural state of BEING. But until we start to detach from all these things and more, we continue to participate in the narrative that keeps us from true cognizance. More importantly, it keeps us from arriving to the truth of love that is ever present for us all.